I See There's Husbandry in Heaven...

Well, husbandry is thrift.

Are you husbanding someone? Being husbanded?

I feel like husbanding.

So I went out husbanding this evening.

I made it home just before darkness fell, which is good because I am attracted to vampires.

Lee is sleeping.

He will wake to the nasilicious redolence of a Henri Bendel candle. I found this while I was changing holiday themes.

If he doesn't wake to the smell of the delicious food I picked up while I was out.

We bought wasabi cashews the other day and Lee pointed out how perfect they would be to add to shrimp lo mein. That's such a great idea because our Chinese takeway has gotten wimpy and won't hot the food up properly anymore when you request.

I just know there's a story there. Some wimp came back and threatened to sue or something, because they used to make it fiery hot when you asked!

I am so gay I actually have little toys and chinoiseries and such for every holiday. My foyer is now ready for St. Patrick's Day although I couldn't let go of the Cupid bear bud vase holding the crystal rose.

Yes, it's that gay.

Anyway, I found an unopened Henri Bendel candle from our more prosperous summer in the sideboard when I was digging in there for more hidden holiday items and putting others away. They're like twenty-five bucks but since they were phasing out the old design and rebranding at Bath & Body Works I got two for the price of one.

This one is "Firewood" but it's really great...it's like firewood with some strange perfume added...not patchouli but close to that...it's great...you feel like you're in the Taj Mahal or something.

It makes you feel like humping a pillow.

Anyway, I did my rounds. I did the thrift store where my favorite clerk (who reminds me of Eileen Myles though I don't know her except through her poetry) was working so I got to chat with her.

She is in recovery for six months now and is a friendly, no-nonsense, funny lesbian who seems to know just what to say to embarrass me terribly for every item I buy lol.

I did NOT let her know my next stop was the liquor store.

I was soooo sad because I saw the grocery store where my Dad used to shop after his stroke was all boarded up.

I liked that store so much because I always thought "maybe I'm using his cart."

It was a nice quiet store on the edge of the bad neighborhoods but not in them. So you got great prices and they had the best deli in town.

Also a great ethnic foods aisle and great exotic coffees that none of the other stores stocked for some reason!

I felt horrible. That's connected to the Thrift Drugs store which novelist/poet Bill Shields used to manage which has been closed up for many years now so I know what's coming next.

Bulldozing.

Bill was published by Henry Rollins for many years. Maybe he still is. I don't know. Bill's ex-wife is a good friend of mine (a writer and publisher) and when we were on the phone and Rollins would call, she would deliberately put him on hold and tell me to keep talking. And then I would feel nervous knowing Rollins was waiting on hold while we were talking about kittens or something. But then I sort of enjoyed it. He talks enough.

Bill's a great guy. When he was supposed to throw out all the candy after holidays (dumb policy!) he would invite all of us over and it would be candy and chocolate bonanza day! Not so sure about Rollins though he used to be sexy. Bill would do readings with him at some of the colleges around here. I know millions of women still want to have Rollin's baby. The Black Flag thing but not just that. I really find that show IFC runs (is that the one?) of his monologues insufferable. If I were really high or drunk I might think he's funny. But then if I were really high or drunk I would probably read Billy Collins and enjoy him too.

But Henry Rollins can go to Israel or Greece or China and read and people will love him.

Because he has muscles and he wants to please you.

He's like the Colton Ford of writing. Only not gay. Stop saying that. He's so not gay.

And even my favorite Greek restaurant--about fifty yards in front of the Thrift/Weis shared structure--where I always used to hang in the middle of the night with poet Maurice Esworthy is closed. This is all on 29th Street in Harrisburg, which is actually the dividing line between Harrisburg proper and suburbia. Matt Cozart's poetry is spookily like Marty's sometimes, but I'm sure he has no clue who Marty is. (Matt, your "Doc Severinson" poem is pure Esworthy.)I love Marty's poetry. He rarely publishes. He's an awesome guy. The last lost New York School poet. In Harrisburg.

Hey, it happens like that sometimes.

Marty had this performance piece called "Thinking about Ng" where for years he went places and publicly thought about this girl on the internet he was in love with.

Marty is the only poetry institution in Harrisburg really. Gene Hosey a little.

And Paco (a.k.a. Frank Miller but not the comic book Frank Miller).

Today I was telling somebody about Paco because something reminded me of his Coloring Book of Death (which is just what it sounds like).

Someday I will have to write The Lives of the Harrisburg Poets.

It will be a thin book but fun anyway.

I say that because here's what I found tonight at my thrift store.

The Elizabethan World Picture by E.M.W. Tillyard. Just over a hundred pages and I plan to sit down and read it right through in the next few days. I love that period. And love to laugh at it too.

Lives of the Saints I bought because I don't know where my copy is and I miss it. This covers "The Voyage of St. Brendan," "Bede: Life of Cuthbert" and "Eddius Stephanus: Life of Wilfrid."

I found another large stuffed Tamagotchi that fits down inside the plush white Tamagotchi "unit" and Velcros shut. They are awesome because they look like virtual animals and not real animals. That's the second I found. I also found...

A Tamagotchi flower. I didn't know these existed. Every Tamagotchi I found is in immaculate condition (didn't even need to touch them up) and has original tags.

When Lee sells these online, for some reason people in Germany always buy them. It must still have a cachet with kids there.

A book of Currier & Ives prints from 1942 (Doubleday oversize hardcover). I generally hate all the Currier & Ives based Americana I see in thrift stores although I know which will sell and which won't.

This book blew me away. The prints you absolutely never see and the reproduction of colors on the plates are just beyond belief. Really obscure prints and ones with real charm. I'm not used to C&I having any charm. The Christmas cards with the people who look like mannequins. The Four Seasons. I hate those.

But there are charming sexy ones of boxers and exotic animals and couples flirting in that coy way, and famed disasters of the time.

Just really lovely. I'll have to scan some of them later.

An awesome Staffordshire mug (from England duh) with The Tower Ravens on the Green on one Side and the Traitor's Gate on the other. Immaculate condition.

A Star Trek mug for Lee to sell later. Never used.

A ballerina mouse (tall!) in pretty satin and tulle. Mint condition and so cute. Could have jumped out of Mark Morris's Nutcracker.

Some Royal Caribbean vintage trip commemorative mug accented with 24 kt gold. Again an Ebayable for Lee down the road. Anything vintage and cruise lines sells on EBAY fast.

An adorable little owl who looks like a Furbie who rocks back and forth on a branch and opens and shuts his eyes like one of those cat clocks. He's only the size of an orange.

A little porcelain Siberian Husky pup. Some Husky owner will want him.

I'm sorry I didn't pick up a Danish Modern wooden bowl from the fifties I saw last time. It was European I'm certain. Even with the slight wear it would have been a good resell item for Lee down the road. It was of course gone. The oblong bowl had these little red spheres painted red for feet like a Rietveldt or something. Very cute. Even some of the vintage Dansk items do well online.

I found some other holiday items for us.

I always get the best Christmas and Halloween items this time of year.

I stayed under ten dollars which is pretty good considering I had two bags of items.

I'm forgetting some of the items I bought already. I'm getting old.

Now I am going to go watch something really stupid and get stupid along with it.

But first I think I want to watch something great: my VHS tape of Sugarcubes Live at the Zabor.

Then I'll watch something I can recite in my head like Heathers or Girls will be Girls.

Varla Jean Merman will make any day perfect.

Stevie's Mom Evie: "Were you attracted to his incredibly small penis?"

Varla: "I care about what's on the inside."

Evie: "Well then, you're in luck, because his dick practically is."

Evie is short for evil, I believe.