George Bush Turned Me into a Russian

I was explaining my current modus vivendi to an aunt today.

With little discretionary income (get your cottonpickin' fingers off my State store receipt, that AIN't discretionary), I stay in the house and read dark literature.

I watch the news and realize that crime has become a way of life now for many people who had gainful employment only a few months ago, that survival on the streets is bringing out unbelievable ugliness in people.

Chaos rules and the economists are insane.

People look more to the barter economy since money is so scarce.

Starbucks are as distant a memory as the Dodo already in my town.

And I drink and talk about the darkness of existence with other unfortunates (okay some are fortunates, sorry!).

And then it hit me: I am Russian!

George Bush turned me into a Russian!

George Bush turned a lot of Americans into Russians.

You know it's just a matter of time before we start breaking up, the individual states.

Who will turn Chechnya first?

You just know it's gonna be a Southern state.

The Dollar store is hugely popular now.

Half the city shops in dollar stores.

Because you can like buy a broom for a dollar, a toothbrush for a dollar, dental flossing axes that look like little guitars for a dollar, the latest hardcover novels for a dollar.

My new name is Yuri.

Welcome to Yuri's blog.

"Can I hook you maybe up with some girls? some boys? do you have a 'haptitude for killing peoples maybe?"

We can make this work.

Down here on the street.

It's all we got now.

Katarina will show you how to kill man with bare hands.

Like bear.

With this skill, you will eat.