Mom Said Share

Making snow bunnies in the yard. An altogether lovely afternoon. The tea service should be coming out shortly. The teapot with the elephant spout is my preference this afternoon. The neighbors lied to you. They do that in packs. Hence, a pack of lies. And they walk off in a pack afterwards. Like repeated punctuation. Their legs a bunch of explanation points in a row in a comic book. In their catalogue boots. Like a news crew. You wouldn't answer them with their plaid questions. Bravissimo. They played "good cop bad cop" on you again, didn't they? The "good cop" said that snow angels would be just fine. But the Tolerance Act did not extend to snow bunnies. It bothered them terribly. Something about the sheer numbers of them. There is no "township ordinance" against snow bunnies. They lied about that. Make as many as you like. I counted 142, but that was just the backyard. I know you've been working out front. It's amazing you can do all that with just a spoon and a paintbrush. I guess you could use a mold but then the bunnies wouldn't be individuals, would they? These aren't Ralph Lauren snow bunnies. I appreciate the hand of the artist in every one of them. And don't think I missed the details. That one over there bit that one by the garbage can. Right? I saw the hole in the right ear. How the aggresser looks a tad abashed now. Nice touch. What was it you said to the pack of neighbors? Oh, right. "Mom said share." That too puzzled them. Who is Mom? They looked nervous then, as if Mom might be watching. Some of them scanned nearby windows. Then back at the snow bunnies with that look of burgher horror on their fat faces. "The Lord likes me down on my knees." That got some gasps from some of them. We had best start filming the warren, the colony, before the nutsiest ones venture out in the moonlight tonight with shovels. I promise to hide behind my curtains and film them. In the blue air hacking. Trust me, I know. We went through this in Sarajevo. And Susan Sontag is dead. So whom should we call now?